Session 12

The group convalesced. They reaffirmed their goals (getting the metal, chasing the Wizling). They beat their chests and headed further into the cave. In the fire pit that Vireya had originally been attracted to she found an unopened tin of fish, and she sequestered it away with the rest of her perishable food. She led the charge with his darkvision deeper into the cave, but was taken aback by the creatures populating the next tunnel.

Firstly, and most important to Vierya, the Scheming Wizling was sidling along the far way to the left. Next to the Wizling was a strange, floating alien called a Thumph that was watching her with multiple eyestalks. Behind the Thumph was a brain with tentacles sprouting out of its top that were dragging it across the ground. And even further behind, another Shadow Wisp danced an enticing wiggle. Vireya again resisted the assault on her sensibilities, and took aim with her magic. Against her better judgement, she decided again to not target the Wizling and instead arced a dark Eldritch Blast into the Thumph. The Thumph promptly exploded, spraying the nearby ground in walls with sizzling blue blood. This explosion (which was more like a bubble popping), drew the attention of the nearby creatures and a new fight began. The Wizling singled out Vireya, speaking in the same alien language, but this time interspersed the gibberish with a “bitch” before fleeing down the left path.

The group pushed forward into the narrow tunnel one by one, each grappling with the psychic field emanating from the tentacled brain. Vireya and Harlan, weakened by the wisp’s previous attacks, were affected; not…damaged in any way, just manipulated into believing that the brain posed no harm. In many ways this was not a falsehood as the brain refused to cross the puddle of acid bubbling on the ground. Lorien, who had managed to rebuff the brain’s charm, was distracted by the effort to the extent that the second wisp, dancing against the back wall of the right fork, managed to capture his attention hypnotically. The wisp lured Lorien forward until he stepped into the acid, where the substance melted through his traveling boots and burned the bottoms of his feet. Lorien was immediately awoken by the pain, and evasively sidestepped to allow Irene’s magical blast to slam into the dancing wisp.

Vireya, who had thrown herself down the left fork chasing the Wizling, was stopped short by the sight of another gurgling brain. She blasted the unaware creature into the wall and moved to finish the work on her next chance. The rest of her team grappled with a single, third wisp that Vireya had simply ignored. The wisp blasted the group with another flashbang, and Harlan was sapped of even more of his strength. The group grew exceedingly frustrated, missing spear and club and bullet several times. Lorien in his anger used his wits, stepped back, and used his mage hand to grasp and squeeze the irritating Essence-sucker. He succeeded, and by holding the enemy in place allowed Irene a critical stab through the sphere, bursting it apart. Emboldened by her team’s kill, Vierya sliced the brain at her feet into two pieces with her scythe.

She then, looking up, saw something strange. A lanky and knobby hobgoblin was chained to a nearby rock, sleeping fitfully. As the rest of the group turned the corner, they were met with an even stranger sight. On top of the large, central rock was a brain, similar in shape to the ones crawling on the floor, but with four taloned legs in place of tentacles. It was also much larger, about 3 feet tall and wide. The brain was chastising a different lanky Hobgoblin, accusing him of incompetence. When the brain noticed YFPB, he demanded in a booming voice for all, but especially his dim-witted servant, to behold his power. He injected Essence into the sleeping Hobgoblin, and the group watched with more disgust than fear as he was transformed against his will into a Goblin Chud, a short, looksmaxxed goblin with a dislike of women.

Seeing that the group was unimpressed, the brain, who called itself an Intellect Devourer on account of it gaining intelligence through consumption, argued with them about his own smarts and plans. Vireya asked about the Wizling, and while the Intellect Devourer clearly knew of them, and implied that he commanded them, it quickly became apparent that he was their servant, and was thus useless. The “negotiations” broke down soon after, and the Intellect Devourer revealed his trump card: he was going to consume all of YFPB’s excess intelligence to enrich his own. He gestured and boomed, and…nothing. The adventurers began looking at each other, then at the Intellect Devourer, then started laughing at the fool. In a frothy rage, the Intellect Devourer summoned two Toothy Freaks from adjacent haybales, and attacked the heroes.

The first Toothy Freak made a direct beeline to the first enemy it saw, which happened to be Lorien. As it leapt through the air in an attempt to sink its needle-length teeth into the elf, Harlan stepped forward and swung his shield in a masterful deflection that sent the Freak flying backwards. The Intellect Devourer then used a much narrower application of mental energy, and ripped into Lorien’s mind while he was distracted. The attack was brutal and sent Lorien to the ground in a seizure, unconscious. Harlan took a step back to stand over his unconscious friend, and began healing him as the girls began lobbing magical attacks at the brain. Lorien, snapped back to reality and now prone, reacted with aplomb and aimed his rifle from his lowered position and between Harlan’s legs. His shot took the Toothy Freak in the eye, and with the extra time he earned himself he reinforced Harlan’s healing with his own.

The Goblin Chud attempted to charge past the men to stab at the women, but Lorien caught him with a dagger to the ankle and tripped him. Harlan finished the job with a crushing blow to the skull, and the creature died before even getting a chance to fight. Irene and Vireya’s magic seemed to connect with the Intellect Devourer but did middling damage through what appeared to be a magical shield (though their nefarious necrotic hexes seemed to do more direct damage). The remaining Hobgoblin, as well as the other Toothy Freak that buried its fangs into Harlan’s calf, caught the paladin off-balance and began dragging him towards the Intellect Devourer.. Lorien, sensing weakness, intimidated the Hobgoblin into dropping Harlan and fleeing by pointing his rifled barrel at the creature and threatening him.

The legged brain believed that with Harlan semi-prone and distracted it was his best chance to steal the paladin’s body. He leaped off of the rock and attempted to rip Harlan’s scalp off and replace his brain. He failed, luckily, as Harlan began thrashing in rage and desperation. Annoyed, the Intellect Devourer summoned a third Toothy Freak and continued his assault. Realizing the urgency of the situation, Irene ran forward to stab the Toothy Freak off of Harlan’s leg. The Intellect Devourer attempted to claw Harlan, but was so physically weak that he could not pierce even the borrowed leather armor from the Kalzaharn blacksmith. As the third Toothy Freak attacked Irene, Harlan, who had grabbed the brain’s talons during its feeble attack, swung the enemy rather than his shield and managed to sink the Toothy’s Freaks fangs into the brain instead. Irene and Lorien made quick work of the weakened first two Toothy Freaks (one now imbued with the force rune of Dispositor), and Vireya summoned a Cloud of Daggers to rip apart the third.

Harlan, freaked out by the idea that he almost got his body stolen, held the Intellect Devourer into the fanning blades until the brain was nothing but a mush of pink blood. The final Toothy Freak was then bullied by the heroes of YFPB, shoved in and out of the bladestorm until it too was ripped to pieces. The cave now clear, the group took their time picking over the trash and treasures that the freaks had amassed through robbery. The group found several fun baubles, including a bottle of oil, a whip, and a bell. They also found the box of Orichalcum ingots that they had been sent to find. Eventually, Vireya also discovered and subsequently cornered the Scheming Wizling against a small pool of water at the end of the cave.

The Wizling again insulted the tiefling in the common language, twice, amidst a babble of nonsense. When Vireya whipped out her scythe, though, the creature became even more animated than before, bouncing up and down and gesturing to the scythe. As the rest of YFPB watched, she made the choice to be nonlethal and merely tapped the Wizling with the unsharpened side of the blade. The Wizling sighed in annoyance and allowed itself to fall backwards into the pool. Once the splashes and ripples faded, only a small mirror could be seen at the bottom. Vireya, incensed that a third Wizling had gotten away from her, began stomping in the water and swinging her weapon wildly. Picking up the small, shining mirror, Vireya immediately suspected foul play and began searching the view inside the mirror for inconsistencies. The mirror was very clearly magical and was no simple scrying mirror, but the group was unable to parse its purpose.

As the group returned back to the capital, bloodied but triumphant, they noticed immediately that the ragtag market outside of the city had gone quiet. Indeed, it was nearly completely empty when they arrived, and were immediately concerned. Before they could enter the city, though, a cawing caught their attention. A single merchant remained at the market: a Crow with a Bowtie selling blind box potions! This crow demanded no money but instead asked for goods to be bartered with. He offered a huge variety of potions in various shapes and sizes, and gained the goodwill of YFPB by offering a free sample that restored Vireya’s vitality. The bartering took nearly the entire rest of the day, as the group haggled and negotiated and threatened and scammed and brought out every piece of treasure that they were willing to part with. The crow was far friendlier than its cousins, and quickly became a favorite.

Eventually, the full accounting came to such: Harlan traded his bottle of Holy Water for a Skull-shaped Crowtion, Vireya traded his Livelove Lollipop for a Moon-shaped Crowtion, and the group gave up Harlan’s Depthdweller Staff for a Fish-shaped Crowtion, a water sack-shaped Crowtion, and a small thin Crowtion from the Crow’s extra storage. The group, having driven a hard bargain, watched the Crow gather up his blanket into a large bundle and begin dragging it away while carrying the massive Staff in its tiny mouth. They turned back towards the city, and resolved to discover what had happened to cause such silence.